I have been thinking…
Throughout my own journey, I have yet to understand the numerous lessons learned in this life. Moreover, in reality, I have often failed to recognize "lessons" themselves! I realize that we are multi-sensory and some communications are received more clearly than others are. For me, things take awhile to soak in…
In addition, we hear a lot about empowerment these days. Becoming empowered is regarded as an enviable, desirable position to attain in ones life, and definitely a desirable state in which to live. Nevertheless, how to ever attain that status? How do we empower ourselves? How do we take control? It often seems, the less we have control, the more frustrated we become. I have experienced this frustration in the past four months.
I always believed that we learn by living every day in the present moment, honoring our commitments and responsibilities, regardless of how convenient or inconvenient. We do not often, consciously think about our ability to enter into the center of our hearts and attempt to strengthen our own spiritual beliefs. The reality is, we are all free spirited, and able to choose how we wish to live here. Living every day and trying not to harm what is in front of us, beside us, or behind us. To see beauty where others see ugliness. To find the divine in the simplest aspects of nature or others around us. Being aware of our actions, how they effect others, and make sound decisions accordingly. In each of us should be the priority, to be able to help others around us to complete our lives
I have been thinking how our lives are filled with miracles. Often, without realizing, we see and experience them everyday. Just as often, the entanglement of our everyday living either blurs our vision or we refuse to look outside of the tunnel we are following. So many of us are living on the fast track most of the time not able, or desiring to slow down. We put ourselves on a sub-conscious time schedule where we do not take the time to enjoy the moment or follow our own inner timeline that leads to inner peace. I often envy those who have listened to that inner voice and followed their hearts.
In the past months, I have tried to take the time to think back over my life, attempting to count the many times that miracles have occurred in my own life. The times that I was saved from near accidents, or serious illness where I was able to recover. I began to recall individuals who were close to me. Those who recovered from major illness and were able to go on with their lives. Those who have averted certain tragedies. It has been during these reflections that I am more aware of the miracles and know that we are all, blessed by the Great Spirit.
This four-month experience I believe has caused my faith become stronger. At this moment I believe there is, a Greater Being and that I must have the faith to recognize, and perhaps analyze my own miracles. Sometimes a miracle can turn our lives around where we begin to slow down and see how precious each moment of our lives is. Yet, many times we forget to say "Thank You". There have been so many people who have stepped forward during my recent illness. They are my miracles. I surely wish to thank them…
I would like to believe that even with the tests, the hurdles and obstacles I've been faced with in the past four months that now is the time to attempt to clear out my brain of the negativity and the chaos that seems to surround my life. And of course to say "Thank you…" more often. I do need to be more clear-sighted and receptive to the smaller things, because the daily experience of life is flowing and powerful and should rise above the boundaries that limit so many people. Including me.
Though I often think I am "different", I do not feel I am alone. I would like to hear from those with similar rational wanderings…
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Sunday, June 22, 2008
Thursday, June 19, 2008
A Large Gap In Time...
I apologize for the gap in time. It's a long story with gory details. I've been in and out of the hospital, suffered through 3 major operations and have been trying to recvover ever since. Today, I sent out this massive e-mail and then thought, "Why didn't I just blog it?" So, here it is. I will try to stay more current, now that I have a bit more energy and am recovering...
What has been an otherwise bland, mixed review kind of a day, ended up with a couple of uplifting, mood altering events of sorts...
To begin, I received a telephone call from a friend and former scuba diving partner (I was going to say "old" scuba diving partner, but Tony is younger than I am!!). Tony and I go way back, actually to the insurance office days. Early on, we discovered a mutual interest, scuba diving. Before we knew it, we were spending weekends traveling around the Midwest together hitting every dive spot we could find. We made a few trips to Bull Shoals Arkansas, Blue Eye Missouri. Although we could swap stories, we never made it together to any of the more attractive, clear water locations; the Bahamas', Cozumel.
Tony was one of the few, that I was ever comfortable with as a dive partner. We seemed to have this uncanny ability to communicate under water that I hadn't experienced with many other divers. Eventually, I was even invited to assist Tony with his weekend Scuba classes, where he acted as an instructor at both at the YMCA and College of St. Mary. The experience gave me the opportunity to socialize with new people, get the gear wet in the middle of winter, and keep some of the skills honed...
As is the case with so many relationships, time and other responsibilities overshadowed the extracurricular scuba outings, and after four or five summers, our outings faded away. We managed to kept in touch from time to time; the ocasional telephone call, Christmas and birthday cards. A shared lunch in the middle of town. But even those get together's slowly faded away.
Anyway, Tony said he was in the neighborhood and wanted to stop by just to visit. It was great seeing him, as we agreed it had been a couple of years since our last reunion. Instead of just a "...stop in and say hello visit, Tony stayed for two and a half hours as we did our catching up... So what started out as another solitary confinement kind of day, ended up with several hours of welcome company and a friendly face.
I was set to watch the game of the North Carolina/LSU College World Series being held here in town, when the skies opened up and we became inundated with a real downpour. Lightning, wind, the whole bit. Like many other parts of the Midwest, it's not as if we need the rain, but it's here. So, instead of watching the game, I figured to spend some time at the computer.
I know I've told everyone about my friend Amanda. Just in case though, she the artist http://www.amandakoh.com who now lives in Washington State. Anyway, when I first advertised the three pieces of art I had for sale, Amanda must have forwarded the ad to everyone she knew. In turn, it got passed along to others. I was contacted by a man named John, who eventually bought "Cougar In the Snow". John, after visiting my web site, sent me the web site of another friend of his saying that Rita and I shared an interest in rusty old automobiles. With nothing but time, I spent quite a bit of time on her web site/blog and eventually wrote her a letter about our shared interest. In the return mail, Rita sent a photograph of an old red pick-up she'd taken. With her permission, I downloaded the picture and commenced to playing with it. A few days later, I returned the now altered photograph via e-mail. This afternoon, I received this, in my e-mail: http://oldcars.wordpress.com . I hope that you spend a little more time in her blog than just the article about me, and perhaps even visit some of the links she has on her site. All of her articles are well written and will hold your attention. Once I started, I spent I don't know how many hours browsing around. but then, I'm into "twisted metal" (as Rita appropriately calls it).
I don't know. I was just excited and re-energized after reading everything she'd written. Oh, and be sure to click on the "before and after" pictures in her article.
So, I apologize for the length of the letter, but it ended up being a pleasant day for me. One I've needed for awhile. Since there's no baseball tonight, I figured I'd catch up!
What has been an otherwise bland, mixed review kind of a day, ended up with a couple of uplifting, mood altering events of sorts...
To begin, I received a telephone call from a friend and former scuba diving partner (I was going to say "old" scuba diving partner, but Tony is younger than I am!!). Tony and I go way back, actually to the insurance office days. Early on, we discovered a mutual interest, scuba diving. Before we knew it, we were spending weekends traveling around the Midwest together hitting every dive spot we could find. We made a few trips to Bull Shoals Arkansas, Blue Eye Missouri. Although we could swap stories, we never made it together to any of the more attractive, clear water locations; the Bahamas', Cozumel.
Tony was one of the few, that I was ever comfortable with as a dive partner. We seemed to have this uncanny ability to communicate under water that I hadn't experienced with many other divers. Eventually, I was even invited to assist Tony with his weekend Scuba classes, where he acted as an instructor at both at the YMCA and College of St. Mary. The experience gave me the opportunity to socialize with new people, get the gear wet in the middle of winter, and keep some of the skills honed...
As is the case with so many relationships, time and other responsibilities overshadowed the extracurricular scuba outings, and after four or five summers, our outings faded away. We managed to kept in touch from time to time; the ocasional telephone call, Christmas and birthday cards. A shared lunch in the middle of town. But even those get together's slowly faded away.
Anyway, Tony said he was in the neighborhood and wanted to stop by just to visit. It was great seeing him, as we agreed it had been a couple of years since our last reunion. Instead of just a "...stop in and say hello visit, Tony stayed for two and a half hours as we did our catching up... So what started out as another solitary confinement kind of day, ended up with several hours of welcome company and a friendly face.
I was set to watch the game of the North Carolina/LSU College World Series being held here in town, when the skies opened up and we became inundated with a real downpour. Lightning, wind, the whole bit. Like many other parts of the Midwest, it's not as if we need the rain, but it's here. So, instead of watching the game, I figured to spend some time at the computer.
I know I've told everyone about my friend Amanda. Just in case though, she the artist http://www.amandakoh.com who now lives in Washington State. Anyway, when I first advertised the three pieces of art I had for sale, Amanda must have forwarded the ad to everyone she knew. In turn, it got passed along to others. I was contacted by a man named John, who eventually bought "Cougar In the Snow". John, after visiting my web site, sent me the web site of another friend of his saying that Rita and I shared an interest in rusty old automobiles. With nothing but time, I spent quite a bit of time on her web site/blog and eventually wrote her a letter about our shared interest. In the return mail, Rita sent a photograph of an old red pick-up she'd taken. With her permission, I downloaded the picture and commenced to playing with it. A few days later, I returned the now altered photograph via e-mail. This afternoon, I received this, in my e-mail: http://oldcars.wordpress.com . I hope that you spend a little more time in her blog than just the article about me, and perhaps even visit some of the links she has on her site. All of her articles are well written and will hold your attention. Once I started, I spent I don't know how many hours browsing around. but then, I'm into "twisted metal" (as Rita appropriately calls it).
I don't know. I was just excited and re-energized after reading everything she'd written. Oh, and be sure to click on the "before and after" pictures in her article.
So, I apologize for the length of the letter, but it ended up being a pleasant day for me. One I've needed for awhile. Since there's no baseball tonight, I figured I'd catch up!
Monday, March 10, 2008
I'm learning. I'm learning how "not so smart" I am. With blogs, and e-mails, and instant messages, and forwards, and gigs, and bytes and uploads and TIFFS and JPEGS, it's all rather overwhelming. Now I know how my grandparents felt, the first time they tried to program the VCR (which was Betamax, by the way) I gave them for Christmas one year!
I just got off of the telephone with Anne (who owns Perfect Postage.com by the way), and she has once again, come to my rescue. I should elaborate....
I've been "creating" art for a few years. I did it to relax. I created, to let my brain go to other places. I expected compliments from friends and family, which I eventually recieved, You know the kind? The "Oh, that's nice Dennis.." kinds of compliments. But, when strangers started to take notice and request, "Hey, could I get a copy of that? Only bigger?". Then of course I was ready to quit my day job and call myself an "Artist". The work I create could be considered rustic, rural, unique. I'll let others be the judge...
Thankfully, I didn't quit the day job, but I did heed the advice of a few people, and sought out someone to help me create a web site, to display my work. After all, I am not close friends, not even buddies yet, with any gallery owners. .. Local or otherwise. Though there's one here in Omaha that has been helping me out, I'll save that story for another time. My sister, Colleen, who lives in Kansas City offered up an introduction to Anne. "She's done some cool stuff..." my sister stated. And that was enough for me.
"First, I have to have art to put there" Anne explained. I tried e-mail. I tried burning CD's and sending them. I even made a trip to Kansas City to hand deliver some of the invaluable CD's. Sometimes it worked. Sometimes it didn't. I do beleive it took us four or five months (I'm not exaggerating!!) to overcome the problem of getting the art to her. Then, there was the issue of the "narratives". I'd send 'em. Anne would post 'em. Then a day or two later, she'd get a call. "Can't you move that last sentence over just a tad?" Or, "Why is that word misspelled?" Anne would explain that she was posting my narratives in the exact manner in which she was recieving them. What is that they say? "Garbage in. Garbage out."
Thankfully, Anne has the patience of Job. I'm sure she realized early on that she wasn't dealing with the sharpest pencil in the drawer when it came to my knowledge of websites and transfers and file sizes and all of that... I just wanted to be able to create, and hope people liked some of it enough to buy it! the web site; dennisbuckman.com is up, running and ready to go! Yippiee!!!
Todays telephone call? "Hey Anne? This is Dennis. Hey, I started this thing... A blog? You know what they are, right? Well, I'm having this problem. I thought I could do this myself.. It says I have to edit my page and update my profile and upload a picture and....." I could hear a certain "sigh" on the other end of the phone.... An hour or so later, here I am! The rural Artist, living in Omaha, hoping he can sell enough art work to buy that motor home he's always deamt of, so he can go back to traveling and creat more art... Writing about it, on the Internet! As deal 'ole Grandma used to say, "Who woulda' thunk it?"
Thank you Anne for your patience and your expertise. I know in this writing, I cannot give enough credit to you for all that you've done for me. But look!!! I'm blogging! I'm getting smarter with every telephone call!!!
I just got off of the telephone with Anne (who owns Perfect Postage.com by the way), and she has once again, come to my rescue. I should elaborate....
I've been "creating" art for a few years. I did it to relax. I created, to let my brain go to other places. I expected compliments from friends and family, which I eventually recieved, You know the kind? The "Oh, that's nice Dennis.." kinds of compliments. But, when strangers started to take notice and request, "Hey, could I get a copy of that? Only bigger?". Then of course I was ready to quit my day job and call myself an "Artist". The work I create could be considered rustic, rural, unique. I'll let others be the judge...
Thankfully, I didn't quit the day job, but I did heed the advice of a few people, and sought out someone to help me create a web site, to display my work. After all, I am not close friends, not even buddies yet, with any gallery owners. .. Local or otherwise. Though there's one here in Omaha that has been helping me out, I'll save that story for another time. My sister, Colleen, who lives in Kansas City offered up an introduction to Anne. "She's done some cool stuff..." my sister stated. And that was enough for me.
"First, I have to have art to put there" Anne explained. I tried e-mail. I tried burning CD's and sending them. I even made a trip to Kansas City to hand deliver some of the invaluable CD's. Sometimes it worked. Sometimes it didn't. I do beleive it took us four or five months (I'm not exaggerating!!) to overcome the problem of getting the art to her. Then, there was the issue of the "narratives". I'd send 'em. Anne would post 'em. Then a day or two later, she'd get a call. "Can't you move that last sentence over just a tad?" Or, "Why is that word misspelled?" Anne would explain that she was posting my narratives in the exact manner in which she was recieving them. What is that they say? "Garbage in. Garbage out."
Thankfully, Anne has the patience of Job. I'm sure she realized early on that she wasn't dealing with the sharpest pencil in the drawer when it came to my knowledge of websites and transfers and file sizes and all of that... I just wanted to be able to create, and hope people liked some of it enough to buy it! the web site; dennisbuckman.com is up, running and ready to go! Yippiee!!!
Todays telephone call? "Hey Anne? This is Dennis. Hey, I started this thing... A blog? You know what they are, right? Well, I'm having this problem. I thought I could do this myself.. It says I have to edit my page and update my profile and upload a picture and....." I could hear a certain "sigh" on the other end of the phone.... An hour or so later, here I am! The rural Artist, living in Omaha, hoping he can sell enough art work to buy that motor home he's always deamt of, so he can go back to traveling and creat more art... Writing about it, on the Internet! As deal 'ole Grandma used to say, "Who woulda' thunk it?"
Thank you Anne for your patience and your expertise. I know in this writing, I cannot give enough credit to you for all that you've done for me. But look!!! I'm blogging! I'm getting smarter with every telephone call!!!
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